I think our book club convo was probably really similar 😂. Most of us were rereading it after first reading it while unmarried in college. Soooo different to read as a married person. I also did the audiobook and he was awful. But also just Sheldon is so so aggravating! We all just couldn’t stand his smarmy, self-important tone. Could never be friends with this dude IRL.
I actually think the portrait of their marriage is in some ways *meant* to be just too much! They absolutely made an idol of it and to be fair, he admits as much. Were they also products of their time? Romantics? Hyper-intellectuals? Maybe. Either way, I think many of us found their relationship repugnant in many ways. Davy seems subsumed by Van's ideas, work, personality etc. His conversion does not seem authentic, and he basically admits as much in his sequel “Under the Mercy”.
I thought the *best* part of the whole book was all of C. S. Lewis’s letters and scenes! And actually, I really enjoyed Van’s poetry this time around. In spite of his general smarminess, he could craft a beautiful sonnet!
I tried to not let the audiobook sway my opinion, but it was not a great audiobook for sure! He was totally insufferable. I did say at one point too, it seemed as if Sheldon wasn't too interested in understanding Davy's office jobs but really interested in staying up till 3 in the morning with 19 year old girls! But that's probably pretty catty of me. CS Lewis' letters were so great, and as usual he was so wise.
I had to listen to Severe Mercy myself the day of book club. I thought it was a book about marriage, and when viewed through that lens I detested it more than words could say. I believe they created an idol of their marriage and it was very distasteful and actually repugnant to me.
But then I started thinking about it as a conversion story and also about how the vocation of marriage can be used by God as a tool for conversion and salvation. That was the saving grace of the book for me.
I’m going through a difficult time period in life and have been for years. I loved the titles because it tells like many of God’s mercies to me are severe mercies. Salvation and conversion and holiness seem to always come at such a great price, perhaps because I’m a hard headed learner. I won’t forget that phrase, a severe mercy. I’m currently praying for a mercy to come out of my current suffering.
I think those are great points, Amanda. They definitely had an idol in their marriage and it was fascinating to see God work through it to point them towards Himself and conversion, but it was also painful to read about because of how insufferably he describes it. I really liked the conversion parts of the book and found them so interesting, I would have loved to know more of Davy's interiority because she seemed to have an almost mystical experience. The idea of "a severe mercy" though is a powerful one, we don't like to think that that is how God works, but it's obviously true even when we try to deny it.
I would have liked to hear more of that experience as well. It reminded me of depictions I’ve read of people’s illumination of conscience. My book club pointed out how we don’t really know what Davy thought of a lot of this. That’s not Van’s fault - he has his own view and it was decades removed from her death, but we just don’t know much, and in that sense he’s a bit of an unreliable narrator about his own marriage. But… I wanted to vomit during some of his descriptions of their bliss.
I am so glad you mentioned Elizabeth Peters, because I haven't read any of her novels in forever, and the summer months are probably a perfect time to get reacquainted with Amelia Peabody :) I've been thinking it'd be a good time to reread A Severe Mercy (I usually read it every couple of years) and now I especially want to read through it again with your criticisms in mind; I think that will enrich my reading experience. So thanks for bravely speaking up!
Re: A Severe Mercy-you are not wrong! I feel similarly about their relationship. It was just...not my cup of tea. So much so that I almost found myself looking forward to Davy’s death so Van would finally grow up a little. I felt so vindicated by CS Lewis’s letters towards the end.
Haha, Lewis' letters were so good. I wondered if maybe had Davy lived and they were married longer if they would have eventually matured? It seems to me it would be so hard to sustain that level of a relationship through an entire marriage.
I think our book club convo was probably really similar 😂. Most of us were rereading it after first reading it while unmarried in college. Soooo different to read as a married person. I also did the audiobook and he was awful. But also just Sheldon is so so aggravating! We all just couldn’t stand his smarmy, self-important tone. Could never be friends with this dude IRL.
I actually think the portrait of their marriage is in some ways *meant* to be just too much! They absolutely made an idol of it and to be fair, he admits as much. Were they also products of their time? Romantics? Hyper-intellectuals? Maybe. Either way, I think many of us found their relationship repugnant in many ways. Davy seems subsumed by Van's ideas, work, personality etc. His conversion does not seem authentic, and he basically admits as much in his sequel “Under the Mercy”.
I thought the *best* part of the whole book was all of C. S. Lewis’s letters and scenes! And actually, I really enjoyed Van’s poetry this time around. In spite of his general smarminess, he could craft a beautiful sonnet!
I tried to not let the audiobook sway my opinion, but it was not a great audiobook for sure! He was totally insufferable. I did say at one point too, it seemed as if Sheldon wasn't too interested in understanding Davy's office jobs but really interested in staying up till 3 in the morning with 19 year old girls! But that's probably pretty catty of me. CS Lewis' letters were so great, and as usual he was so wise.
I had to listen to Severe Mercy myself the day of book club. I thought it was a book about marriage, and when viewed through that lens I detested it more than words could say. I believe they created an idol of their marriage and it was very distasteful and actually repugnant to me.
But then I started thinking about it as a conversion story and also about how the vocation of marriage can be used by God as a tool for conversion and salvation. That was the saving grace of the book for me.
I’m going through a difficult time period in life and have been for years. I loved the titles because it tells like many of God’s mercies to me are severe mercies. Salvation and conversion and holiness seem to always come at such a great price, perhaps because I’m a hard headed learner. I won’t forget that phrase, a severe mercy. I’m currently praying for a mercy to come out of my current suffering.
I think those are great points, Amanda. They definitely had an idol in their marriage and it was fascinating to see God work through it to point them towards Himself and conversion, but it was also painful to read about because of how insufferably he describes it. I really liked the conversion parts of the book and found them so interesting, I would have loved to know more of Davy's interiority because she seemed to have an almost mystical experience. The idea of "a severe mercy" though is a powerful one, we don't like to think that that is how God works, but it's obviously true even when we try to deny it.
I would have liked to hear more of that experience as well. It reminded me of depictions I’ve read of people’s illumination of conscience. My book club pointed out how we don’t really know what Davy thought of a lot of this. That’s not Van’s fault - he has his own view and it was decades removed from her death, but we just don’t know much, and in that sense he’s a bit of an unreliable narrator about his own marriage. But… I wanted to vomit during some of his descriptions of their bliss.
I am so glad you mentioned Elizabeth Peters, because I haven't read any of her novels in forever, and the summer months are probably a perfect time to get reacquainted with Amelia Peabody :) I've been thinking it'd be a good time to reread A Severe Mercy (I usually read it every couple of years) and now I especially want to read through it again with your criticisms in mind; I think that will enrich my reading experience. So thanks for bravely speaking up!
Elizabeth Peters is perfect summer reading! So enjoyable!
Re: A Severe Mercy-you are not wrong! I feel similarly about their relationship. It was just...not my cup of tea. So much so that I almost found myself looking forward to Davy’s death so Van would finally grow up a little. I felt so vindicated by CS Lewis’s letters towards the end.
Haha, Lewis' letters were so good. I wondered if maybe had Davy lived and they were married longer if they would have eventually matured? It seems to me it would be so hard to sustain that level of a relationship through an entire marriage.
I am interested to read the book about Davy’s daughter someday. I was floored when I learned about that. It changes the whole context of their story!